Just to make sure we understand each other…because I’m pretty sure that won’t get the same functionality 
Are you saying that disabling the internal relay will still allow local on/off control but only disables dimming? That does not match with anything else I’ve read about it. I thought a disable relay would also disable the physical on/off of the load (always on or always off).
And as I understand it I need the relay to work in a 3-way or 4-way with standard aux switches, right? (most of my switches are 3-way)